Rabbi Steven Pruzansky
Congregation
Bnai Yeshurun
Teaneck, New
Jersey
Intermarriage
and assimilation are the twin tragedies that are devastating American Jewry
today, and both have caused our numbers and level of commitment to plummet. There
are violations of Torah law - a detail of the system - that reflect a personal
shortcoming, and others that threaten the viability of the system itself.
Intermarriage is in the latter category; it is more than just a serious
violation of Torah law; it endangers the entire enterprise of the Jewish
people.
We have always suffered from Jews
voluntarily abandoning their Jewish identity; indeed, such spiritual
“casualties” have historically outnumbered our losses sustained through
persecutions and massacres. It makes little difference whether a soldier is
killed in battle or abandons the battlefield. In either context, he is lost to
the struggle. The notion that a Jew can marry out and still remain an integral
part of the Jewish people persists in Jewish life, despite the inherent
contradiction. And the notion, further, that the sin of intermarriage is
mitigated by a commitment “to raise the children as Jewish” is belied by
experience and common sense. I myself was involved in a case where a child of intermarriage
- “raised as a Jew” - himself intermarried, simply following the lead of his
parents. The faithfulness of such a Jew is almost always quite tenuous and
marginal.
What has brought us to this state, and
what can be done to correct it? Certainly, American society has been uniquely
hospitable both to the observance of Torah law - and to its rejection. The
superficiality of much of Jewish life here - an emphasis on culture, ceremonies
and forms, rather than on substance, ideas and religious commitment - has
smoothed the way to the painless intermarriage process of today. In America
today, Jewish identity is perceived as an ethnic affiliation, not a religious
one. Since most Jews wear their Jewishness (if they do at all) as an ethnic
badge - and not as obliging any religious commitment - they naturally gravitate
to intermarriage as do most Americans in a multi-ethnic society. Indeed, for
most Jews, intermarriage today is no longer even an act of rebellion against
G-d, Torah or parents. It is simply a function of being an American.
But intermarriage is a disaster for
those Jews who perceive their Jewishness not as an ethnic identity, but as a
religious/national identity - for those Jews, whose lives are bounded by Torah,
who perceive themselves as serving G-d in every aspect of their lives.
Therefore, the major problem facing American Jews is that most no longer see
the Torah or Mitzvos as the root of our identity. Torah has been “replaced” by
competing visions of what it means to be a Jew - philanthropy, support for
Israel, liberal politics, Holocaust commemoration, fear of Jew-hatred, etc. But
all those interests are ethnic, not religion-based, and so they have
spearheaded and facilitated the decline in attachment to what it uniquely
Jewish: our covenant with G-d, the bond of Torah and Mitzvos, and especially
the primacy of Torah study.
Intermarriage is the red line that no Jew should
cross - not by marrying out, nor by attending or in any way participating in
such an event. How can one attend, and wish the couple “Mazal Tov”? And for
what, joining in the destruction of the Jewish people? We are all hurt when
Klal Yisrael is in a free fall, our numbers dwindle to record low levels, and
Jewish ignorance soars to record heights. The greatest enemies of American Jews
today are apathy and indifference, not Arabs, Moslems, Christians or neo-Nazis
with spray paint. For sure, we cannot impose commitment and responsibility on
those who are unaffiliated and uninterested in Judaism. But we can and should
always project the beauty of the Torah life, so those with open minds can look
at us and perhaps realize “how fortunate is our lot, and how pleasant is our
destiny”. We can redeem souls on an individual basis, one by one. It is not
enough to denounce intermarriage; it is the obligation of every Jew to present
the Torah and its ideas and values in a way that will win the hearts and minds
of our brothers and sisters who have been raised without it - all to strengthen
our people and glorify G-d’s name.